Sorry, no “Welcome to my home page” ZZZZZZZ, oops, just fell asleep writing that.

Who on earth wants to read that for the gazillionth time? If I didn’t actively invite you here, I would be interested to know how you got here. What made you come to this page? Because I didn’t pay anybody to mis-direct you.
I’m not trying to sell anything, but I have written a novel and am looking for an agent. Please look at the Books page if you are a Massively Successful New York Agent looking for The Next Big Thing in Popular Fiction. Or if you’re a New Agent Starting Out and Need The First Client, ditto.

If you run a self-publishing company, please fuck off, I’m not interested, I have much better things to waste my money on, like a new pair of ear muffs for the beach. Although I do find it entertaining how many of the Google Ads are for self publishing companies. Anyone would think they make a lot of money out of desperate authors.

I write, rant, rave and generally express my somewhat loud opinions at several other sites. You can listen to my ravings, oh I’m sorry, I mean informed opinions, on a few of the sites on my link list.

These are a few of my favourite things.

This is me, Margaret, my beautiful wife, and one of my friend’s kids. I love other people’s kids, but couldn’t eat a whole one.

And a large plate of interesting food. (Those Italians really know how to eat.) Incidentally, said plate of food was a freebie for buying two $4 glasses of wine. Welcome to Italia.

About me.
Born on a dark and stormy night, august 30th 1961. Actually, I don’t remember the weather, but you could ask my mum, she probably does, she wasn’t doing much at the time. I was the first of three, and the only reason there were three is because none of us were girls; she really wanted a girl. If at first you don’t succeed….

I currently live and play on the French Riviera. Say what you like about the French, they make a damn good cup of coffee.
Current interests include poker, sitting on the beach and trying to find a literary agent. “Good luck with that” I hear somebody mutter in the distance.

I am just discovering the joys of WordPress, I have discovered that you can just keep writing and all that happens is the page gets longer. So now I will start making some additions to this page so that all three of my visitors can find out some more about me.

Likes:

Good strong coffee, Apple computers, heated arguments in a pub, short skirts, fast results, writing, the smell of fresh bread, watching the sun go down, sharp cheddar, Marmite, lemon blossoms, strange photographs, getting up late, good quality pens, freshly laundered sheets, playing pool, poker, thunder storms, English beer, German beer, French beer, in fact, all beer, forgetting what day it is, birthday parties, cycling, driving a fast car slightly too fast, a good movie, complaining, the feel of satin on my lips, fizzy bottled water, French bread, the smell of Rosemary on my fingertips, Basil, red wine, Ducati motorcycles, Spaghetti Carbonara, Blues music, particularly Stevie Ray Vaughn, lemon marmalade, old fashioned cooking recipes, silly photos, Omega watches, WordPress, reading a good book, Jamie Oliver, ………to be added to

Dislikes:

Listening to rotten rap music played by someone else’s cheap phone, ice tea, mushrooms, pork, politicians, large corporations who answer the phone with a recorded voice and a menu, Sprint, Windows software, Japanese speakers(and by speakers, I mean the things on the end of a HiFi system, not someone speaking), getting a job offer that turns out to be an attempt to get free web content for a “soon to be the most popular site on the internet and a great resume builder,” did I mention rap music?, noisy neighbours, spinach, cauliflower cheese, nuts, mushrooms, overcooked green beans, breast implants, nightmares, Algerian, cheap cigars, losing ……to be added to.